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Newsletter Vol. #95 Thats How I See It!

Hi and welcome to the first edition of "That's How I See It" without the furnace on. As my mother used to say:

Spring has sprung the grass has ris

I wonder where the birdies is?

Are you doing something you want to tell the world about? Then drop me an email and we'll help you promote it.

The Importance of Friendship on Your Health

-Nearly 100 newlywed couples still in a state of marital bliss were asked to resolve an issue on which they didn't see eye-to-eye. The more sarcastic and nasty they were, the more their immune systems suffered.

-In a study of 86 women diagnosed with breast cancer, the 50 who met once a week to share their fears and advice lived significantly longer (an average of 18 months) than those who didn't participate in a discussion group.

-A group of 276 healthy men and women were given nose drops containing a common cold virus. Result: the people with more social ties were better able to resist infection than those who had a limited social network.

There is power in social connections. Positive relationships are crucial for physical and mental well-being. By contrast, the absence of such connections is proving to be detrimental. Research shows that women's immune systems suffer from lack of connection, while men's cardiovascular systems are affected. The lack of social relationships constitutes a major health hazard that rivals the effects of risks such as smoking, high blood pressure and lack of exercise. And it isn't just the presence or absence of relationships that matters; it is the quality of our connections with others that deeply impacts our physiology.

Couples suffer rapid rises in blood pressure when hostility creeps into their attempts to resolve every day conflicts. Hostility can cause disarray in the neuroendocrine system, which in turn can have deleterious effects on immune function, hormonal balances and cardiovascular health. It appears that women suffer bigger drops in immune function in response to conflict. Women are more responsive to negative marital interactions than men. Women carry most of the burden of unhappiness when close relationships aren't going well, which might explain why (in the 20th-century) they initiate more than two-thirds of all separations.

Longing for a stable relationship is a fundamental human trait and it has only two requirements: regular contact and persistent demonstrations of caring.
                                                Hara Estroff Marano, "Friends For Life"

Newspaper Proofreading is a dying art, wouldn't you say?

"Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash", Expert Says.
Really? You think?

Meaning of Life

     I can't estimate the number of people who feel their lives are out of control because of their addiction: gambling, drugs, alcohol, and sex - "hard addictions". Then there are those with "soft addictions" - they can't lose weight, they can't stop procrastinating, they can't stop spending, they can't speak up for themselves, - bad habits that make them feel miserable and ashamed.
     There are still others who are numb to their own existence - busy working, buying, doing, - yet feeling empty but compelled to continue this life style. Their depression has grown so slowly that it feels normal; they believe life sucks and they can't do anything about it.
     Then there are the rest of us, who get up each day and somehow find the energy, love, self-esteem, and purpose in life to do something meaningful (hopefully), or at least make some sense out of our crazy world. Are we faking it, or are we truly happy/contented/making it work?

For those of my generation who do not, and cannot, comprehend why Facebook exists, read on: 
I am trying to make friends outside of Facebook while applying the same principles. Therefore, every day I walk down the street and tell passersby what I have eaten, how I feel at the moment, what I have done the night before, what I will do later and I give them pictures of my family, my dog, and of me gardening, taking things apart in the garage, watering the lawn, standing in front of landmarks, driving around town, having lunch, and doing what anybody and everybody does every day. 
I also listen to their conversations, give them the "thumbs up" and tell them I like them.
 And it works just like Facebook!!!   I already have four people following me:
Two police officers, a private investigator, and a psychiatrist.

I just arrived back from a holiday on Grand Cayman. I am going to share some of that trip with you and frankly, it's not all that exciting or earth shaking-so consider yourself warned. But I loved it!

Cayman Here I Come!

I had to overnight in Toronto on my way down to the Caymans. I left around 9 PM in the evening and my feeling was this stay was a complete waste of time and money. However, I had no choice as the early morning flight was filled. The hotel NU was okay for the price but I couldn't get to sleep and when I finally did, it was only for two hours. I awoke with a start fearing I would miss the plane.

Lack of sleep leaves me in a fog, lethargic, dopey but still not able to sleep on a plane. So I didn't sleep, I just watched movies and read my book the entire 4-1/2 hour trip.

I arrived in Grand Cayman at 12:20 PM and started an airport experience that lasted 1-1/2 hours. They're building a new airport in the Caymans and getting in and out is a real mess. We stood outside for at least half an hour (tropical sun) before we were allowed inside the building where the line snaked for another hour.

I keep saying "I" as I write this article because Drinda did not accompany me on this trip. I guess my plan to golf daily and the fact that she was needed to look after our grandchildren while Lisa (daughter) attended a wedding out of province, had her quite content to stay home this time.

I picked up my rental car and headed to Brad and Suzanne's (son and daughter-in-law) home. I met up with Brad and he and I went for a beer and some food at our favourite bar- PD's. We spent the evening talking, listening to jazz on their wonderful sound system and watching a movie called, "Molly's Game." I made it through half the movie when my lack of sleep caught up with me and I was out.

Up early, Brad gone to work, Suzanne off island for a week, couldn't find the toaster, didn't know how to make coffee in their new coffee maker, so I did my exercises and took off for a coffee shop. (Isn't this interesting drivel? - Great Facebook material!) I walked for a mile or so down Seven-mile Road, cut through the Ritz Hotel to the beach and walked back with my feet in the ocean, to where I had parked my car. Blue sky, warm sun and ocean breakers attacking my feet, I would have to give Caymans an 'A' on my list of Paradise locations.

I think it's about day six into the holiday: I have golfed five times and painted most of a fence- didn't finish because I ran out of stain. Brad and I will next tackle a large storage container that needs painting. He uses this container to store his many carpentry tools.

Brad and I have eaten out several times- PD's, Cracked Conch, Edwardo's and a delightful Domino's pizza that was totally overdone, burned even, just the way I like it. Brad ordered the NHL package so we could watch the last six regular season games of the Winnipeg Jets. As I recall, in that six-game stretch the Jets won four over-time games.

Today I am sitting at the beach in my cut down beach chair that is easy to get into but damn near impossible to get out of. I am writing intently and don't notice that I am surrounded by a mama hen and 6 chicks. So I share a bit of my sandwich and they are practically on my lap. No golf today as we (Suzanne is back) are going to an early movie- Black Panther. This movie has been creating a great deal of fuss and could become the highest grossing film of all times. I am still sitting at Governors Harbour and chatting with the security guard for the Governor's residence. The sky is the bluest of blue, the sand like silk, people laughing and having fun, sailboats bobbing on the horizon- the only thing better would be to have the rest of my family with me.

Two weeks have gone by and there has been lots of golfing, writing, lying on the beach, and incredible suppers with Suzanne and Brad. The new puppy, which I have given the name Chaos, (but whose real name is Maserati), continues to be the focus of the household. Their other French bulldog is named Bocati and he is much calmer. Brad has had to fortify and increase the height of the original fence to keep little Chaos in the yard and safe. She doesn't try to get out of the yard to escape, but rather to explore.

Suzanne's parents Sally and Tom came for the weekend. They are wonderful people and we had a great and relaxing evening at the Cracked Conch restaurant. I do believe the Cracked Conch has become our favourite restaurant on the island. The next evening Suzanne, with Brad's help, prepared a fabulous meal. We had some wine, good food, and good company-life is great!

Governors Harbour Beach has become my favourite spot to write. I take my beach chair, a rock to hold my papers down, a coffee and I am set (in the shade). Another favourite place to write is Papermans, a coffee shop that features great scones and big cups of steaming coffee. Come to think of it, you can't really see the steam-the outside temperature is too warm.

Brad's purchasing of the NHL package has been just great. Every second night we have the Jets setting new franchise records. It has been amazing at how many close games they have won lately and I am really looking forward to the playoffs.

Today I had coffee with realtor, Vince Budesa, and we shared stories about our lives and families. I talked about my daughter in law Suzanne's new event planning business. He believes my new book Communication & Relationships can change people's lives- boy that Vince really knows what he's talking about! Kidding aside, I know chances are slim, but if you're ever on the island and looking for property, please give Vince a call at RE/MAX.

I stopped in at a small restaurant that I had passed numerous times when on the island. I don't know what prompted me to drop in that morning but I'm glad I did. I met the owner of the West Bay Diner, Danny Lamarca, an Aussie with the gift of the gab and great food out of his kitchen. We decided the next time I'm on island I will do a book signing at the diner.

Another absolutely fabulous restaurant is in the Ritz Carlton Hotel and is called Tuka. Sushi is their specialty. I think Suzanne, Brad and I have started a new tradition because we had a fantastic time there my second last night on the island. I really do like hot Sake!

Suzanne had arranged a supper boat cruise on my last evening in Cayman. It was an absolutely beautiful evening--warm breeze, incredible sunset, and wonderful company. We met an interesting couple from New Jersey and after a couple of drinks we were sharing like we were in a therapy session. Great evening- thank you Suzanne.

I'll stop for now, but if you want to hear my horror story about the return trip, tune in next week.

Remember to locate the suntan lotion, get your grass raked, and polish up the golf clubs, spr...ummer has arrived.

Have a great week!